“What are you in here for then?”
“Arson and murder. What about you, kid?”
“The Glee cover of Teenage Dream.”
"People that download music illegally might be arrested."
jesus you’re suspended for a week for making water to wine and selling it in chocolate milk cartons
Share A Coke With An Old Friend You Haven’t Seen In Years And The More You Think About It You Slowly Realize That You Can’t Remember Their Face As Clearly and You’ve Forgotten The Sound of Their Voice And The Phone Number You Have For Them Doesn’t Work Anymore and You Realize That The People From Your Past Are Becoming Harder To Visualize Like Trying To Remember A Dream After You Wake Up
now that im in the space mood i’d like to remind each and every one of you that NASA drew a dick on mars. we drew a dick on another planet. that is mankind’s legacy.
THIS IS AN ACTUAL PHOTO OF THE SURFACE OF MARS. PLEASE NEVER FORGET THIS.
CATS ARE FUCKIN WEIRD
don’t pretend you wouldn’t stretch like this if you had the flexibility
Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting
you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left
why do teachers think that yawning is rude like i’m oxygen deprived what do u want me to do